hurt, sad and disappointed

am feeling very hurt, sad and disappointed....
is this how u feel when u leave us?

its not your fault that we became worse after u left...
this is ultimately a ticking time bomb sooner or later
since we seemed to keep so many things from each other

am comforted though to hear about you being an immortal as a construction worker...
that's the happiest thing we heard since you left...
i believe and choose to believe you are the chosen one...
and that you will be happy now...
we will meet again

Why?

Its already 5Feb. From 12Jan till now, so many things have happened. There's so many whys, whys and whys but I guess we'll never know the answer. Many a nights, we will be wondering why and what ifs...what ifs we had done this or done that, would it still happen? We thought things would improve and try to strive to improve each day as it pass, but then we'll think of you and the sadness will start all over again... We don't really believe that's the real you when you did that...but whatever, the deed had been done and we'll only be able to know when we join you in future...